Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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