I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
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