my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize