I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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