3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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