We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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