You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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