Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
When did angry sex become our thing?
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize