I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize