Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
You have to summon your inner elephant
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
