Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
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