Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
