i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
