She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
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