Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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