We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
