we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I AM VODKA MAN
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
