I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Randomize
