His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
A bitchslap is in order.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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