I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
