Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
