When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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