My friends, they love my intelligence
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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