how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
