just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
