He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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