Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
