I accidentally burped into my bong.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
