yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
