We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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