Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
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