Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I just want to make out with him forever
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
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