i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Randomize
