Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
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Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
As shirtless as possible
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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