I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Found your dick twin last night
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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