rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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