Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Randomize
