I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
