I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
