Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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