so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
