I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I'm both gender and math confused
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
