I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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