What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
