this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
