Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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