I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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