You work out of a Hotel?
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize