Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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