I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize